Hey friends !
‘Not all girls are made of sugar, spice and everything nice. Some girls are made of adventure, fine beer, brains and no fear.’
So I was on bumble last night having a little browse in bed before I went to sleep and I matched with this one guy, for identity purposes let’s call him Bob. So Bob was reasonably good looking, he had a picture of him walking a dog, a picture of him with a baby and one with a rugby ball. Bob had obviously thought carefully about his choice of pictures, calling out to women with his ‘sweet side’ whilst simultaneously portraying he’s also a tough rugby lad. I get it, and I appreciate the effort.
So we matched and following the apps rule that girls message first I sent an upbeat ‘Hey how are ya?’ Like I usually do. We exchanged a line or two and he asks me what I’m up too, I tell him I’m in bed with a cold, watching friends and relaxing and he replies-
‘Ah not sexy but can’t be helped. You’re not my usual type but I’m intrigued’
I laughed out loud at his arrogance and it left me thinking, why do some guys think our life goal is to impress them and appear composed and attractive at all times?
May I make it very clear, girls.
- Illness is sexy
- Phlegm is sexy
- Coughing is sexy
- Blocked noses are sexy
- Snotty tissues are sexy
And do you know WHY? Because YOU are sexy. You are human and you have human functions and human illnesses. You are not under any circumstances obligated to act a certain way in order to appear ‘sexy’ and especially for immature men you’ve just met. I made no attempts to impress this guy, I was just being friendly and replying with a down to earth comment. I had absolutely 0 interest in being sexy whatsoever, however for entertainment purposes I have come up with a few ‘sexy’ replies that he may have found satisfactory…. *coughs* *coughs phlegm by accident because I’m ILL* *YES that’s right ILL*
- My flatmate and I are investing in some fight-friendly pillows for our naked wrestling match later
- I’m applying suede protector to my thigh high boots with easy-to-undo zip
- I’m ironing my nurses outfit because Halloween is approaching and I want to be prepared with a unique and gender appropriate costume
- I’m preparing a delicate meal of blanched asparagus and pine nuts that won’t bloat me and is both graceful to eat and spill-free
- I’m doing an at home Pilates DVD whilst listening to a CD of dolphins because they’re clever and unselfish
- I’m having the toilet removed because I’m a girl and we don’t use them obviously
- I’m making potpourri from all the flowers that I have collected from my many, many interested suitors
May I just reiterate that you should NEVER be made to feel ugly because you are under the weather. A guy who kisses you regardless of your health is WAY more of a man than a guy who shies away from a few splutters and sneezes.
I had many a giggle coming up with these stereotypically feminine responses and if you have anymore please leave them in the comment section (guys too!) for me to have a chuckle at ! And head over to @charlotravel for more personal pics of my adventures.
Enjoy your evening loves